8.31.2005

alice came in for dinner the other night, and it was really nice to see and talk to her. she comes in often on sundays, when her own restaurant is closed, but this time, she was by herself and sat at the end of the bar so we could talk to her. i asked her what fanny was up to, having just finished at yale, and we launched into this discussion of young people and existential angst. obviously, fanny is in a bit of a different situation than i am--she has an extremely famous and opinionated mother for one thing (not that mine's not opnionated)--but it sounds like she's just as lost as i am. we all have to figure out who we are, apart from our parents and friends and everyone at some point, and it's a difficult, sometimes painful, thing to do. i'm sure fanny's disadvantages in this situation equal her advantages: yes, she's got the priveliges of being alice's daughter (and i'm sure there are many), but she also has to deal with the fact that alice waters is her mother, and what that means to her and for her life.

in the end, i was incredibly heartened by what alice had to say. she paraphrased something that her friend peter sellars talks about--that ultimately, life is about living every day consciously, and making every decision matter. it doesn't matter if you hate your job, another one will come one day. it doesn't matter if you struggle with your meaning in life constantly. just make every day count by living a conscious life.

she was much more eloquent than i.

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